Don't be a Menace to Konoha While Throwing Your Kunai in the Woods
by Konoha no Kaijin
Summary: What would happen if Naruto was given a fair shake at life? One visit to the academy from the Hokage can change everything and put Naruto on the correct path for an aspiring ninja. Will hopefully be Epic in length, Non- YAOI. No pairings as of yet. AU, first fic R&R and please enjoy


Don't be a Menace to Konoha While Throwing Your Kunai in the Woods

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto; also, I am writing this on an iPod touch until which point I am not too poor to buy a laptop that has spell check, so bear with me.

Chapter 1: Correction

Sarutobi sighed deeply. The tension building between his village and it's most hated enemy, Iwagakure, had been rising steadily the past months and showed no signs of abating. That accursed village was true to it's name and was as stubborn as stone. They simply could not live with the shame of being put down by one of the greatest shinobi to ever live. The Gears of War were once again beginning to turn, his old bones could feel it.

Hearing a knock at his door, the old Hokage was pulled from his reverie. "Enter," he spoke solemnly and the door opened slowly opened revealing a heavily bandaged man, a man who to this day the wizened leader couldn't tell if he was more of a friend than an enemy. "It would seem that the storm is nearly upon us, I have seen the clouds gathering on the horizon," the half mummified man stated cryptically. "Yes, it would seem so. However, storms bring rain and rain brings opportunity; yet I cannot shake the feeling that is what you are here seeking, Danzo," Sarutobi replied coolly, taking a long drag on his pipe before turning to face his lifelong rival.

Danzo gazed upon the face of his most beloved friend impassively before beginning to speak, clearly choosing his words wisely, "Let me train the Kyuubi boy Hiruzen. You know that I could turn him into the most fearsome weapon this village has ever seen. You refused me Kushina and she is gone, do not make the same mistake twice." The elderly Sarutobi weighed the request in his mind; on one hand, Danzo very well could make Naruto into one of the most fearsome warriors this world has ever seen, however doing so would incontrovertibly ruin any semblance of a normal life the child would have. Not that Naruto's life was all that spectacular as it stood, but how much could one community ask of a child? At what point was the potential good of all not worth the ruining of an innocent child's life? It was at that thought that Hiruzen decided that with everything that been already been forced upon the young child that he at the very least deserved the chance to decide what path he took on the road of life.

"I... cannot condemn the boy to a life as a mere tool when he already carries a larger burden than any of us. It is not what Minato would have wanted," the Hokage stated heavily. He knew Danzo would be disappointed with not getting what he wanted, however he also knew that Danzo was no stranger to disappointment and not getting what he wanted (*cough* Hokage seat *cough*) and that he would get over it.

Danzo showed no outward emotion but inside he was seething at his old nemesis' inability to make the hard decisions that were best for the village. Cursing the man's bleeding heart, he turned away from Sarutobi and strode to the door. Before leaving however he stopped and looked back at his friend, "You can't keep him from our life, not from what he was born to be." And with that last sentiment, Danzo left the building never knowing exactly how right he was.

With Naruto, a few days later, at the ninja academy

A seven year old boy was outside cleaning erasers while sulking in his own thoughts. Today was the day Old man Hokage was supposed to show up and talk to his class about the importance of ninja studies and to explain just why his class was allowed to start early and become ninja early. However, life is not kind to our young protagonist and he was, of course, kicked out before the Hokage showed up and forced to do menial labour.

'Stupid Mizuki-sensei, and his stupid face, and stupid hair, and stupid, stupid, STUPID ERASERS!' the young blonde shouted inwardly whilst slapping said stupid erasers together. He might get in trouble for shouting obscenities at his teacher out loud, but in his own head no one else could here him... right? How he wished he be inside basking in the glory that is the Hokage.

Inside with the class

The class was buzzing with excitement for obvious reasons, as it is not everyday that the Hokage shows up to address a single class. "Alright! Quiet down kids! I know you are all excited that Hokage-sama will be joining us today but I'm sure I don't need to tell you how important it is to be respectful and listen carefully to what he says," Mizuki stated as he began to straighten his uniform in anticipation. He didn't have to wait long as the classroom door slowly slid open and the venerable old kage strode in smiling.

Sarutobi stepped into the classroom and smiled while looking over the class that was staring at him with stars in their eyes. Something was missing however, a very loud and blonde something. Hiruzen looked over the class once more to ensure he was in the right place before he turned to Mizuki to ask, "Mizuki, I was under the impression that Naruto-kun was a part of this class, I am not mistaken am I?" Meeting his leaders eyes, Mizuki couldn't help but see the glint of danger right below the surface. "Yes Hokage-sama he is," the unnerved chuunin replied. "Then perhaps you could tell me where he might be?" Sarutobi asked. "Ahh...," Mizuki started but was quickly cut off by an enthusiastic Kiba, "He's outside cleaning erasers because he's not a good student like the rest of us! Right Mizuki-sensei?" "Oh? Cleaning erasers? Is this true?" The Hokage asked. "Y-yes, Hokage-sama," Mizuki replied, a bead of sweat forming on his brow. "I see, well, you should be able to handle cleaning your own erasers; why don't you go do that and send young Naruto in," Hiruzen instructed in a tone that clearly said that he was not finished with the misguided instructor.

With our young Hero

"Dumb. Stupid. Erasers.," Naruto was grumbling, his expletives being punctuated by the sharp clapping of the erasers. "Naruto!," he heard a sullen voice call from across the yard. Turning around the boy saw the white haired man that was the cause of his current predicament. "More erasers?" The boy grumbled to his teacher. "No," Mizuki replied, "Hokage-sama requests your presence in the classroom." Naruto brightened up instantly , "Woo Hoo! No more erasers for me," he shouted jubilantly before tossing them into the air and taking off at the speed of Gai. "Wow, he's pretty quick...," Mizuki thought before, THUMP THUMP, the erasers came down right on top of his head covering him in a cloud of chalk powder. "HIDING IN CHALK NO JUTSU!" came Naruto's voice from across the yard. "Grrr...," Mizuki growled, a tic mark growing on his head before he bent over to pick up his erasers.

In the classroom

Sarutobi was chuckling good-naturedly to a story from Kiba about how Akamaru picked him when a yellow... thing... slammed into him wrapping it's arms around him. "Hokage-jisan!" Naruto shouted while hanging off of Sarutobi. "Ohoho," Sarutobi chuckled, "It is good to see you too Naruto-kun." The rest of the class watched gobsmacked as they watched their venerable leader pry the class dope off of him and then exchange pleasantries as if they were family.

"Ahh... Now now Naruto-kun why don't you go sit down with your classmates," Sarutobi said nudging Naruto towards his classmates. Naruto pouted a bit before giving the elderly man a big grin and going to sit next to his Sakura-Chan... Which promptly failed and left Naruto sitting next to a portly Akimichi, much to Sarutobi's humor.

"As most of you know from your history lessons, the last two wars we have been engaged in has left us on less than amicable terms with a few shinobi villages. Does anyone know which ones?" Sakura immediately raised her hand followed by a few hands from... No one. 'What do I pay these instructors for?' Hiruzen wondered to himself before pointing to Sakura, "Ms. Haruno." "Iwagakure and Kumogakure," Sakura answered concisely. "Correct," Sarutobi replied smiling at her, "and does anyone know why that is?" Again Sakura was the only one to raise her hand. 'Really? What do I pay these instructors for?' "Go ahead Ms. Haruno." Sakura cleared her throat, preparing for a full blown textbook verbatim response when Sarutobi decided to intervene. "Perhaps I should just explain," he stated quickly.

"In the second war, Kumogakure killed our very own second Hokage, an act we have yet to forget. However, it is in the third war that our trouble arises. In one single act our Fourth Hokage decimated an entire army of Iwa ninja. None were spared from his onslaught, and Iwa has been out for blood since that day," the Hokage stated grimly. "That being said, we are now brought to today and the reason I am here. You are the first of many classes that are to be enrolled in an advanced pace academy course. You will be graduating at age 10 at which time if you hold to your studies and listen to your instructors you will be more than adequate for the title of genin. No favoritism or neglect from instructors will be tolerated. Nor will any slacking from you students. We will need your strength and numbers before long and how you perform now may dictate the difference between life and death for the person next to you. Any childish squabbles are to be settled immediately. In my eyes you are all my shinobi and adults as of now." The Hokage eyed the reactions of the students and was met with silence and wide eyed stares. "That will be all," Sarutobi stated and strode out of the room.

The Hokage Tower, HO-val office

"You requested my presence Hokage-sama?" A sweating Mizuki asked tentatively. "Ah yes, Mizuki, I was hoping to have a talk with you about your class for this year," Hiruzen responded calmly. "Um... ah, yes. What about them Hokage-sama?" the chuunin instructor asked. "We will need everyone we can get in the coming days, and those students are an integral role in that. I expect ALL of them to be more than prepared by graduation. And I mean ALL of them, including Uzumaki Naruto. In fact if Naruto is not one of, if not the, most prepared graduate I will look upon it as a personal failure on your part. We may be pressed for man power but I do not take accept failure well, and it would be quite easy to make a single chuunin such as yourself go missing in the upcoming strife. Am I clear?" Sarutobi asked, a dark look upon his visage. "Absolutely Hokage-sama," a visibly shaken Mizuki responded. "Good. Now get out of my office."

Well that's chapter 1. Please review I thrive on feedback. Thanks


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